Testimony by Jessica Whiteaker
My husband and I are in the midst of our first adoption right now! We are adopting Daniel from Eastern Europe through Reece's Rainbow. Daniel has Down syndrome. How did we get here?
On our first anniversary we decided it was time to begin our family, and we were pregnant within two months. Sadly, a week after finding out I was pregnant, I was in the emergency room having a miscarriage. We were devastated.
When the doctor said it had been long enough and we could start trying again, we did. Within a few more months we were pregnant again. As you can imagine, we were quite nervous this time and kept our news pretty quiet until we got to 13 weeks. Then we announced it to the world! We were overjoyed to have made it past the "danger zone" and began shopping and planning and discussing names.
At 16 weeks we found out we were having a girl. My husband, who thought for sure it was a boy, was a bit disappointed. But he rallied quite well and within a few hours he was excited! Of course our daughter was going to be perfect. A few days later I felt off. Couldn't explain it, but something wasn't right, so I called the doctor and asked if I could come in for a quick check.
When I got there the nurse couldn't get the fetal heartbeat on the monitor, so we went to do a quick ultrasound. As soon as she put the wand to my belly and I saw the screen, I knew. Our daughter was gone. This was five days before Christmas, 2010.
Fast forward through the holidays, which at this point are a blur. In March of this year we were introduced to Reece's Rainbow by a friend of ours whose daughter has DS. She told us to just go look at it, and consider donating to one of the kids if we could. That Sunday afternoon I sat down and started reading and looking at the site. I was bawling within minutes. My husband thought I was crazy, but I had to ask them some questions. My email was responded to in less than an hour. On a Sunday! From that point on all I could do when I wasn't working was pore over the site. Every day we talked about having a baby and adopting. Could we do both? Maybe. What if we can't have a baby at all? Would a "disabled" child fit into our lives?
We prayed! Oh how we prayed! And we argued....a lot. My dear husband was not ready to "give up" on having a biological child. I was so ready to commit to a specific little boy. We were at a crossroads. About this time we went on vacation. This was supposed to be our "babymoon" trip. While on this trip we talked more and more about adoption and I was fully ready, but my husband still was not.
Two days in I started praying that God would change his mind. Fervently I prayed for five days but to no avail.
At the end of the week we had made it half-way home and were boarding the last flight. It was late and we were a bit slappy at this point, laughing and poking each other. Then I noticed a boy walking down the aisle of the plane. He was SO excited and just couldn't contain it! He had Down syndrome. I watched my husband watch the boy. After he had passed us my husband turned to me and said, “Tomorrow I want you to call whoever you have to...tell them we are coming for our son!”
God has been so amazing to provide for us during the past six months. We still do not know if God's plan includes biological children, but we do know that his plans include one of the cutest little boys I have ever seen in my life. We are finalizing our dossier this week, and hope to have it to his country by next week. The next step of our process includes meeting him and then coming back home for about three to four months for everything to be finalized. Daniel will be four on December 26, 2011. I have never in my life felt more right about anything. Our son is already loved more than he can imagine!
If you would like to read more of our story please go to our adoption blog. We update as often as we can.